All about cats

What does a cat have that no other animal does

A cat.

What's the difference between a cat and a lie?

One cat.

What's the difference between a cat, a lie, and the truth?

One cat, one lie, and four truths

What do you get when you feed a cat a can of tuna?

A cat that's stinky, sick, and full of fish

Which of the following is not a cat?

Human

What did the cat say what was a cow?

It's not a cow!

Why did the cat cross the road?

A mouse was in the middle

Why does a cat hate water?

Because it drowns if it swims.

What do you call a cat that has drowned?

A drowned cat.

What's green, has four legs and makes a loud noise?

A cat

What do you get if you cross a cow with a cat?

A cat that can't bark

What's the difference between a cow and a cat?

A cow says moo, and a cat says mew.

What do you call a cat that walks on water?

A duck.

Where do cats go on a date?

To a "CAT-tastrophe"

What did the cat say to the mouse?

I'm not a mouse, I'm a CAT!

Why does a cat always wet itself?

It can't be dry.

Why do cats talk?

Because they can't sing or whistle.

What do you call a cat that can't talk?

A mute cat.

What did the cat do to the mouse?

It ate it.

What did the cat say when it got a new toy?

Mews with delight!

Why does a cat whistle?

Because it can't sing

What do cats do when they have to go to the bathroom?

They go to "Let's you and them".

To get to the other side.

What did the cat do after it ate the mouse?

It got sick and threw up.

What did the cat say when it saw the dog?

It barked.

Did you hear about the cat that ate a bat?

What do you call a cat that doesn't have a tail?

No tail.

It mewed.

What did the cat say when he saw the dog?

It meowed.

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